The scene: The Editor’s office at a small, almost insignificant regional newspaper but one that, in common with other seemingly small and insignificant local newspapers, is actually owned by a big international media company with angles.
The editor sits and sighs despondently as she reads the screen.
There is a knock on the office door. Continue reading “To err is human, to collide is what we call it”
It is one of those times where accessing the slightly bizarre world that Bryntin lives in is a hard thing to do. In an effort to only give you the funny and not the sadly regular more difficult, I’ll step away from the keyboard until such time as the clouds disperse and the normal dodgy standards of light silly can be resumed.
Thank you for your patience.
Police are investigating after it emerged that an advent calendar contained a type of food that was supposedly well below the sugar levels traditionally found in advent calendars.
The Inspector in charge of the team gave this statement.
“We were alerted by the sugar industry that a subversive advent campaign was underway with the blasphemous contents of savoury foodstuffs. This goes against centuries of tradition of small and insignificant – but crucially sugar-filled treats – being behind a little door on a mass produced and likely novelty scene printed, less than one month calendar which is loosely tied in to the favourite children’s film franchise of the day or a trending teen pop star.” Continue reading “Roll over Jesus”
“Right then Sixth form Eton gentlemen, you are only weeks away from your holidays and this is your last ‘Life in out in the Real World’ class.
As you had Professor Fosdyke-Bletherington give you the lecture on avoiding arrest, by making sure your nostrils are properly cleaned with your handkerchief once you finish snorting your drugs, I thought this week I’d further prepare you for the real world by instructing you in another use for your ever present handkerchief.
Continue reading “Eton handkerchief snakes”
The phone rings at Wellington Police HQ.
“Hello, Sergeant Forbes.”
“It’s alright Sergeant, it was a false alarm.”
“Ah Constable, so there were no terrorists or breaches of the peace?”
Continue reading “In a flap about trousers”
Opening the WordPress app this morning I found that I had received another award.
Or, to put it more accurately, I had received a notification of my blog now having gained a total of 50 followers, in orange and with a little picture of a trophy overlayed on it.
Continue reading “Another 50 milestone”
I am a morning lark.
I am generally awake, up and out of bed, drinking coffee and eating breakfast while sitting in front of my computer by about 7am. Despite not being currently employed and not actually having the imperative of commuting to work of any sort. This, I think, seems faintly virtuous.
It’s not actually my choice though.
Continue reading “Nightly slumber party illustrated with pies”